pause

i love my neighborhood. i'm glad every aspect of my life happens all in the same community. the buildings are beautiful, the parks amazing (i've never lived in a community where there are LITERALLY 7 parks within EASY walking distance; we could stretch that number to probably 10 or 11). i love my neighbors, the different people, all with their own stories. stories of struggle as single moms, stories of struggle as refugees, stories of victory over addiction, stories of God's provision being abundant and present.

but, i'm also kind of upset...upset and sad. this is why...i love it here, don't want to move. but i'm don't like waking up, going to work and finding these.

and no, i'm not upset because I have to clean it off. i'm upset because in the last 10 days there has been two shootings in our neighborhood. i'm sad because another 18 year old kid's life has ended. i'm upset because this is often seen as ok. i'm sad because i hear neighbors say we should just stay out of the park...like we should just give them the park. here, have this beautiful, massive playground, pavilion, field, and basketball courts built for our kids. we should just walk away and let them have it.

now this is where i might get myself in trouble...

i'm tired of that. i'm upset because some gang-bangers think this is what they should be doing with their time. i'm upset because young men are being fooled into believing this is how manhood is expressed. but i'm tired of people saying we should stay away from the park, from the community. "let's get out of here." i'm not asking anyone to do anything they can't. i'm not asking anyone to put themselves at risk. i'm not asking anyone to put their kids at risk. i'm not asking people to come, flex muscle, yell, scream, pound our fists and force this out of the neighborhood. i am asking people to not be afraid. i am asking people to laugh. i am asking people to play. i am asking people to have cookouts, and invite their neighbors over; ALL their neighbors, no matter what they look like or what they are wearing. i am asking people to love each other, and even those with the spray cans in their hands. what a better way to subvert expressions of power (that's all those things are...that and boredom), than to come and laugh and play and eat and love. what a better way to subvert expressions of power than to show, by our actions...that we are not afraid. Let's show we aren't afraid by going out and living. Living freely. and then...lets invite them to come and live free t0o.

as is scrubbed this stuff today i thought of that verse in the Bible that says, 'Perfect love casts out fear.' i've been afraid, no doubt. there have definitely been moments when i've approached situations and my heart has been racing. but, if i love my community, if i love these cats wielding the cans and guns...if i love them with even an ounce of the love that Christ has for me, for them...

...what place does fear have?

there is so many things i want to say. to my neighbors, which includes the 60's. the first is this; i love you. i love that i can call you neighbor. i love that i'm in this community with people like Herman and Nike Greene, and that I can call them family. the second is this, i won't be afraid. will you join me?